Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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What is up in the air and wobbles?

A jellycopter
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