Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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