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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?
Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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How do you make an egg laugh?
Tell it a yolk.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?
Roberto.
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Why did the sun go to school?
To get brighter!
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?
With its sparrowchute.
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Where do cars go for a swim?
At the carpool!
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?
Root position cords.
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What do postal workers do when they're mad?
They stamp their feet.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with
but I've been trippin' all day.
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What do you call a mad elephant?
An earthquake.
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