Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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Dorian Gray Jokes,

they never get old!
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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