Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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Why is slippery ice like music?

If you don't C sharp - you'll B flat!

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How did Ben Franklin feel after discovering electricity?

Shocked.
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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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