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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?
Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What do you call a messy hippo?
A hippopota-mess
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?
Bugs Bunny.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?
Spelling.
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What do Santa's elves drive?
Minivans.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.
but enough about Kanye West.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?
About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?
Carlos.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.
I've lost three days already.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?
Decalfinated
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