Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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