Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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What do you call a fairy who doesn't take a bath?

Stinker Bell.
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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What goes under your feet and over your head?

A jump rope.
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What do you call two banana peels?

Slippers.
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