Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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How many junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

``Oh wow, is it like dark, man?''
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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