Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What do you call a Disney Princess that supports Donald Trump?

Snow White Supremacist.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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The other day I sent my girlfriend a huge pile of snow.

I rang her up, I said "Did you get my drift?".
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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