Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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