Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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