Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?

Snow balls!
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?

The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What is the difference between a guitarist and a Savings Bond?

Eventually a Savings Bond will mature and earn money!

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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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So I met this gangster who pulls up the back of people's pants,

it was Wedgie Kray.

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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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