Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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Which candles burn longer, bee's wax or tallow?

Neither, they all burn shorter.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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How many Bratzlaver Hasidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find a bulb that burns as brightly as the old one.
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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's fine, he woke up.
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