Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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