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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?
To see how long he slept.
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When did the fly fly?
When the spider spied her!
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?
None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?
The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.
Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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How are elephants and trees alike?
They both have trunks
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Which day do fish hate?
Fryday
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?
Boo-Jeans.
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What game do elephants play when riding in the back of a car?
Squash
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Why don't bears wear shoes?
What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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