Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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