Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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How many anarchists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

All of them.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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How do you fix a broken brass instrument?

With a Tuba glue.

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