Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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What kind of fly has a frog in its throat?

A hoarse fly!
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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