Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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What do you get when you cross a Cocker Spaniel,
a Poodle and a ghost?

A cocker poodle boo.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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