Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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I rang up British Telecom, I said, "I want to report a nuisance caller",

he said "Not you again".

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Why does the Easter Bunny have a shiny nose?

His powder puff is on the wrong end.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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