Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda

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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.

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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.

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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.

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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.

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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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