Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What do have when a lawyer is buried up to his neck in sand?

Not enough sand.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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How many fire safety guys dose it take to screw in a light bulb?

One -- but it's an 8 hour minimum.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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