Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda

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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.

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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".

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