Why did the cat go to Minnesota?

To get a mini soda
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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How can you tell is a singer is at your door?

They can't find the key, and they never know when to come in.
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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What do you call a chicken in the 1960's?

A funky chicken.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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How do you make a band stand?

Take their chairs away!
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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