Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?

She ran away from the ball.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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