Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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Sherlock, what are you doing with that 200lbs shrub?

It's not a shrub, it's a lemon tree my dear Watson.
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Who's richer — the butcher, the baker, or the candlestick maker?

The baker, because he has lots of dough.
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A neutron walks into a bar. He asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?"

The bartender offers him a warm smile and says, "For you, no charge".
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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