Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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