Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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