Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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What do dinosaurs and decent lawyers have in common?

They're both extinct.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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