Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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How do you know when the moon has enough to eat?

When it's full.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There's a primitive for that.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?

Snow balls!
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