Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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