Why did the chicken cross the playground?

To get to the other slide!

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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me

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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to

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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.

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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.

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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.

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