Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?


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what do you call a tick on the moon?

A luna-tick
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.

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