Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.

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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.

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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.

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How many freelance biotechnologists does it take to change a light bulb?

One; she designs the bulb to crawl up the wall, unscrew the old one, and screw itself in.

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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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