Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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Why are ghosts so bad at lying?

Because you can see right through them!
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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