Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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How many Bell Labs vice presidents does it take to change a light bulb?

That's proprietary information. The answer is available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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If you don't know what introspection is,

you need to take a long, hard look at yourself.
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed?

She couldn't control her pupils.
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