Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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Why did the boy take a ladder to school?

He wanted to go to high school!
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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