Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What do you call the best butter on the farm?

A goat.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What cheese do you use to coax a bear out of the woods with?

Camembert.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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