Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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