Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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How does a dog stop a video?

He presses the paws button.

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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?

Sell it and buy a violin

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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?

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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.

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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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Dorian Gray Jokes,

they never get old!
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