Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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Why are giraffes so slow to apologize?

It takes them a long time to swallow their pride.
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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.
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Where did the farmer take the pigs on Saturday afternoon?

He took them to a pignic.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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