Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What did Jay-z call his wife before they got married?

Feyonce

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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?

A Moo-sician!

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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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