Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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How many junkies does it take to change a light bulb?

Oh wow, is it, like, dark, man?
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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