Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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If you drop a white hat into the Red Sea, what does it become?

Wet.
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