Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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