Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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