Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How do hair stylists speed up their job?

They take short cuts!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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