Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'

So he gave me a kite.

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What goes on and on and has an i in the middle?

An onion
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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