Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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How many folk singers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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