Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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Why did the boy take a ruler to bed?

To see how long he slept.
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What airline does Donald Trump aspire to fly?

Hair Force One!
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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What did the alien say to the garden?

Take me to your weeder!
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What is a vampire's favorite fruit?

A nectarine!
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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