Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to repent.

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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What two things can you not have for breakfast?

Lunch and dinner.
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