Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.

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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals

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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.

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Does it take longer to run from 1st base to 2nd, or from 2nd to 3rd?

From 2nd to 3rd because there's a shortstop in the middle.
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