Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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Can you say Richard and Robert had a rabbit without using the "r" sound?

Sure, Dick and Bob had a bunny!
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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