Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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How many bureaucrats does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assure the everything possible is being done while the other screws the bulb into the water faucet.
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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