Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.

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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.

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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut

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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.

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What did the laywer name his daughter?

Sue.

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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.

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