Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only two, but the hard part is getting them into the light bulb.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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