Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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How many nuclear engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to install the new bulb and six to figure out what to do with the old one for the next 10,000 years.
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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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Middle C, E-Flat and G walk into a bar.

Sorry, says the barman, we don't serve minors.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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