Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What kind of dress can't be worn?

Address.
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Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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How many editors of Poor Richard's Almanac does it take to replace a light bulb?

Many hands make light work.
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