Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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Some lettuce, an egg, and a faucet had a race. What was the result?

The lettuce came in ahead, the egg got beat and the faucet is still running.
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