Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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How many Feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That's not funny!!!
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