Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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How many database people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: one to write the light bulb removal program, one to write the light bulb insertion program, and one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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