Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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