Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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