Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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