Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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When is a car not a car?

When it turns into a garage.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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