Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What has ears like a cat and a tail like a cat, but is not a cat?

A kitten.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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What goes up and down but never moves?

Stairs.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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Where are sharks from?

Finland.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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