Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What did the boat say to the pier?

What's up, dock?
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How do you make a rock float?

Put it in a glass with some ice cream and root beer.
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How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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