Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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How many fundamentalists does it take to change a light bulb?

None; the Bible doesn't mention any light bulbs.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend?

He gave her a ring.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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