Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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What room does a ghost not need?

A living room!
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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