Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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How many thought police does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. There never was any light bulb.

Notes: Probably the only really good light bulb joke of 1984.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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Where did the music teacher leave her keys?

In the piano!

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