Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.

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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel

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What's a tree's favorite drink?

Rootbeer.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board

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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan

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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?

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