Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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How do you get a trumpet to sound like a french horn?

Put your hand in the bell and play a lot of wrong notes.

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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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