Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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Where do computers go to dance?

The disk-o!
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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I went to the Doctors the other day, and he said, 'Go to Bournemouth, it's great for flu'.

So I went - and I got it.
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