Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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Why did the computer squeak?

Someone stepped on its mouse.
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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Why do chemists like nitrates so much?

They're cheaper than day rates.
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Where do you go to find a million story building?

You go to the Library!
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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