Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?

Outlaws are wanted.
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What school do you have to drop out of to graduate from?

Parachute school!
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Why did the banana go to the hospital?

Because he wasn't peeling well!
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