Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah;

I thought, "He's trying to pull a fast one".

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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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PMS jokes are not funny...

[Period]
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