Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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What is the quietest kind of a dog?

A hush puppy.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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What is the most important rule in chemistry?

Never lick the spoon!
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What is green and pecks on trees?

Woody the Wood Pickle.
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