Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?

Stick his bill up his ass.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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What do you call a cow that's just given birth?

[De-Calf-Inated]
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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