Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What does one bucket say to the other?

I am feeling pale today.
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What kind of driver has no arms or legs?

A screwdriver.
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How do we know the Indians were the first people in North America?

They had reservations.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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