Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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