Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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How many gorillas does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it sure takes a shitload of light bulbs!
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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What is at the end of everything?

The letter G.
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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