Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang

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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.

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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.

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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs

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What kind of underwear to reporters wear?

News briefs.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess

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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile

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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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