Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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What does a skeleton say before dinner?

Bone appetit!
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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Helium walks into a bar,
The bar tender says "We don't serve noble gasses in here."

Helium doesn't react.
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to take notes while the other screws it into the faucet.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Why did New Jersey get all the toxic waste and California all the lawyers?

New Jersey got to pick first.
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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