Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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There were five people under one umbrella. Why didn't they get wet?

It wasn't raining!
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.

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You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes,

he's a catholic converter.


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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.

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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.

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