Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Why did the banana split?

It saw the ginger snap.
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What's the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?

A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four

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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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Why did Mickey Mouse go to outer space?

He was looking for Pluto.
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