Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean
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Why did Mozart sell his chickens?

Because they kept saying "bach bach"!
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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What kind of phones do people in jail use?

Cell phones
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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