Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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How many conservatives does it take to change a light bulb?

One; after reflecting in the twilight on the merit of the previous bulb.
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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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What did the snowman say to the customer?

Have an ice day!
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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