Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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The new band called 1023MB.

They haven't had any gigs yet
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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