Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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What does Santa like to do in the garden?

Hoe, hoe, hoe!
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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