Why did the farmer wear one boot to town?

Because he heard there would be a 50% chance of snow!
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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How many Carl Sagans does it take to change a light bulb?

Billllyuns and billllyuns. Light bulbs are part of the interstellar "goo" that pervades our universe; they are star stuff.
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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