Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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What do you call a baby bear with no teeth?

A gummy bear
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How many radical feminists does it take to change a light bulb?

That isn't funny!
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What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?

One is really heavy, the other is a little lighter.
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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What do camels use to hide themselves?

Camelflauge
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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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