Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.
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So I was on a train with Einstein and he turns to me and asks...

Does Boston stop at this train?
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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How many plastic surgeons does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he'll also want to do something about your nose.
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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Whats the difference between Terrorists and Accordion players?

Terrorists have sympathizers

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Why was the piano player arrested?

Because he got into treble with the cops

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