Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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Why to lawyers wear neckties?

To keep the foreskin from crawling up their chins.
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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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What do frogs order when they go to a restaurant?

French Flies.
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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