Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vampire?

A vampire only sucks blood at night.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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Why doesn't Donald Trump sweat like Marco Rubio?

Because he has such yuuuuge fans!
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Three people were in a boat. They all fell off. Only two people ended up with wet hair. Why didn't the other person's hair get wet?

Because he was bald!
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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What do you get from a bad-tempered shark?

As far away as possible.
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