Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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How many sound engineers does it take to change a light bulb

None, sound engineers don't do lights
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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Who makes the best cake on a baseball team?

The batter.
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How do you get a trombonist off of your porch?

Pay him for the pizza

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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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