Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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How many frat guys does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and the other two to help him down off the keg.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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