Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.

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What's green and loud?

A froghorn.

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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.

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A small piece of sodium that lived in a test tube fell in love with a Bunsen burner. "Oh Bunsen, my flame," the sodium pined. "I melt whenever I see you,"

The Bunsen burner replied, "It's just a phase you're going through."
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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How many "pro-lifers" does it take to change a light bulb?

Six: two to screw in the bulb and four to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
None; the bulb will change itself when it is ready.

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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet

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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.

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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.

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