Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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Now that Macy's has severed ties, with Donald Trump, how can the average American look like the President?

By hunting and killing their own hair piece.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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