Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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What kind of mouse does not eat, drink, or even walk?

A computer mouse.

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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.

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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.

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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.

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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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