Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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Why didn't the rooster cross the road?

Because it was chicken.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What do you call a chicken in the 1960's?

A funky chicken.
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