Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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How many Wardrobe people does it take to screw in a light bulb?

"Nobody said I needed doubles on that!"
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