Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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What did the alien say to the cat?

Take me to your litter.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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How many Federal employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Sorry, that item has been cut from the budget!
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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