Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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What do you call a 400-pound gorilla?

Sir.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?

Hope it's Halloween!!
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