Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia?

Because it's pretty basic stuff.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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What do you call the security guards outside of Samsung.

The guardians of the galaxy!
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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