Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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