Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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