Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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