Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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What do clarinetists use for birth control?

Their personalities.

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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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