Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop

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How does a mouse feel after it takes a shower?

Squeaky clean

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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine

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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.

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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.

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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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