Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants?

Just in case he got a hole in one!
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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How is Donald Trump going to create middle class jobs?

By paying them to cheer for him during campaign events.
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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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