Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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How do locomotives hear?

Through the engineers.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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When Susan's boyfriend proposed marriage to her she said: "I love the simple things in life,

but I don't want one of them for my husband".

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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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