Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What time is it when 5 dogs chase 1 cat?

Five after one.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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What did the light bulb say to its mother?

I wuv you watts and watts.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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