Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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