Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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