Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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How many Development Executives does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Well, first let's talk about the concept behind this whole "light bulb" thing.
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Why won't sharks attack lawyers?

Professional courtesy.
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What did the teddy bear say when it was offered dessert?

No thank you, I'm stuffed.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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They stopped a vulture from bringing his rotting carcasses on the plane

but he said "You said I could have two carry on items!"
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.
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