Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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How many assholes does it take to change a light bulb?

None; assholes never see the light anyway.
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