Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three, but they're really only one.
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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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