Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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What kind of pants do ghosts wear?

Boo-Jeans.
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What is Donald Trump "really" trying to do?

Make America Hate Again.
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When is a door not a door?

When it's ajar!
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