Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What are the 10 letters of the pirate alphabet?

Aye, Aye, Arr and the Seven C's
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?

When you're a mouse.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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How many brewers does it take to change a light bulb?

About one third less than for a regular bulb.
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