Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What did the sardine call the submarine?

A can of people.
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How many Jewish American Princesses does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to call Daddy, and one to get the (pick one:) mineral water/Tab.
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Where is a rabbit's favorite place to eat?

Ihop
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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