Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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There were two cows in a paddock. One of the cows says, "moo"

and the other one says, "That's what I was going to say."
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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Did you hear oxygen went on a date with potassium?

It went OK.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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