Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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Why does a stork stand on one leg?

Because it would fall over if it lifted the other one.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What did one tooth say to the other tooth?

The dentist is taking me out tonight.
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Why did the gardener plant his money?

He wanted his soil to be rich!
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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What is the name of 007's Eskimo cousin?

Polar Bond.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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