Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.

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What music does cheese listen to?

R & Brie.
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks

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What does cheese say to itself in the mirror?

Halloumi.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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How many economists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to assume the ladder and one to change the bulb.

A': None. If the government would just leave it alone, it would screw itself in.

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What do you get when you cross a stream and a brook?

Wet feet.

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