Why did the melon jump into the lake?

It wanted to be a watermelon.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?

Their lips are moving.
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