Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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What's the difference between a piano and a tuna?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna

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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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What kind of math do Snowy Owls like?

Owlgebra
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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