Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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What's the difference between a female lawyer and a pitbull?

Lipstick.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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What is Donald Trumps biggest dilemma now that he's president?

Finding a cabinet position for the thing on his head!
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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