Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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What did the pencil say to the paper?

I dot my i's on you!
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What can you put in a barrel to make it lighter?

Holes.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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What is a spaceman's favorite chocolate?

A marsbar!
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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