Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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Why do loud, obnoxious whistles exist at some factories?

To give us some sort of appreciation for flutes.

Did you hear about that music composer who committed suicide? He didn't even leave a note.

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What's the difference between a snow man and a snow woman?

Snow balls!
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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