Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.
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What's black and white, black and white, black and white and green?

Three skunks fighting over a pickle

First dog: My master calls me Furball. How about you?
Second Dog: My master calls me Sitboy
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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