Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named 'Amal.' The other goes to a family in Spain, they name him Juan'. Years later; Juan sends a picture of himself to his mum. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wished she also had a picture of Amal.

Her husband responds, "But they are twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."

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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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How many college girls does it take to change a light bulb?

That's "women," you unfunny jerk!
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Why should you never tell a secret in a corn field?

Because there are too many ears.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.
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Making bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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