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Why did the opera singer go sailing?
Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.
"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?
All of them
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What kind of dress can't be worn?
Address.
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Where do fortune tellers dance?
At the crystal ball.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.
She was wearing massive gloves.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?
OH SNaP!
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How many radical feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
That isn't funny!
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?
He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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