Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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How many data base people does it take to change a light bulb?

Three:

One to write the light bulb removal program,
one to write the light bulb insertion program, and

one to act as a light bulb administrator to make sure nobody else tries to change the light bulb at the same time.
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What has a lot of keys but can not open any doors?

A piano.
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