Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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What's the difference between Donald Trump and Ronald Reagan?

If Trump gets Alzheimers his IQ will go up.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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Ah, I had a great boomerang joke...

It'll come back to me.
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