Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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Why are elephants wrinkled?

Because they don't fit on a ironing board
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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What is the best thing to do if you find a gorilla in your bed?

Sleep somewhere else.
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a gigolo?

A gigolo only screws one person at a time.
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What did the Cinderella fish wear to the ball?

Glass flippers.
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What bone will a dog never eat?

A trombone.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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