Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?

He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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What did the peanut say to the walnut?

Nothing. Nuts can't talk.
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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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