Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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What did one titration say to the other?

"Let's meet at the endpoint."
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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