Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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