Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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What's black and white and red all over?

A sunburnt zebra.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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