Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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What's the difference between a mosquito and a lawyer?

One is a blood-sucking parasite, the other is an insect.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What's the first thing a musician says at work?

"Would you like fries with that?"

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Why don't lawyers go to the beach?

Cats keep trying to bury them.
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