Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Went to the paper shop -

it had blown away.
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What is the difference between a clarinet and an onion?

Nobody cries when you chop an clarinet into little pieces

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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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