Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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How do you make a fire with two sticks?

Make sure one is a match!
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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