Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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Which is the most religious cheese?

Emmental...it's very hol(e)y...
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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What did the clock do after it ate?

It went back four seconds!
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