Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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How many skunks does it take to make a big stink?

A phew.
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Why was the cat afraid of a tree?

Because of the bark
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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A sandwich walks into a bar.

The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here"

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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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