Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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How many dull people does it take to change a light bulb?

One.
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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How many existentialists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to screw it in and one to observe how the light bulb itself symbolizes a single incandescent beacon of subjective reality in a netherworld of endless absurdity reaching out toward a maudlin cosmos of nothingness.
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.
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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year
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