Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What did Michael Jackson say to Woody Allen?

Got two fives for a ten?
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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How do chickens get strong?

Egg-cersize.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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