Why did the orange stop in the middle of the hill?

It ran out of juice!
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Whats Donald Trump's favorite nation?

Discrimination.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What do you call two ants that run away to get married?

Ant-elopes!
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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How many Bluegrass musicians does it take to screw in a light bulb??

What's a light bulb?
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.
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