Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What goes tick-tock, bow-wow, tick-tock, bow-wow?

A watch dog.
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What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist's arm?

A tattoo.

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What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4-leaf clover?

A rash of good luck.
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What has 6 eyes but can't see?

3 blind mice.
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Have you heard the one about a chemist who was reading a book about helium?

He just couldn't put it down.
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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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