Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and God?

God doesn't think he's a lawyer.
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Why did Venus have to get an air conditioner?

Because Mercury moved in.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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