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Why did the oreo go to the dentist?
To get his filling!
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?
Carlos.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?
A cow walking backwards
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How are elephants and trees alike?
They both have trunks
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What do you do when 50 zombies surround your house?
Hope it's Halloween!!
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?
None, because they were copycats
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?
The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?
Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?
No one can eat just one potato ship.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.
The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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