Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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How many bass players does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But the guitarist has to show him first.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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Where do fish keep their money?

In a river bank
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Why do cows wear bells?

Because their horns don't work.

There were two cows in a field. The first cow said "moo" and the second cow said "baaaa." The first cow asked the second cow, "why did you say baaaa?" The second cow said, "I'm learning a foreign language."
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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How many stock brokers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to take out the bulb and drop it, and the other to try and sell it before it crashes (knowing that it's already burned out).
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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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