Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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Why did the boy put candy under his pillow?

Because he wanted sweet dreams.
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When does New Year's Day come before Christmas Day?

Every year!
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Why was the woman fired from the car assembly line?

She was caught taking a brake.
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!
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What do you call a boomerang that won't come back?

A stick.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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