Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What kind of driver has no arms or legs?

A screwdriver.
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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What's 182 feet tall and made out of pepperoni and cheese?

The leaning tower of Pizza.
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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