Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What's the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead lawyer in the road?

There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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Where did the sheep go on vacation?

The baaaahamas

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What is a frog's favorite year?

Leap Year

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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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Four fonts walk into a bar

the barman says "Oi - get out! We don't want your type in here"

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Online money has recently been discovered to be a not-yet-identified super heavy element.

The proposed name is: Un-obtainium.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.

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What do you call lending money to a bison?

A buff-a-loan

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