Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What is a ghost's favorite pie?

Booberry pie!
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My first girlfriend was a tennis player but she broke my heart.

It was like love meant nothing to her.
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What's the only difference between Donald Trump and Bozo the Clown?

Bozo The Clown has real hair on his head.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: "Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!" The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: "The driver just insulted me!"

The man says: "You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
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A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why?" they asked, as they moved off.

"because," he said "I can't stand chess nuts boasting in an open foyer."
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