Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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How many lesbians does it take to change a light bulb?

Three: One to screw it in, and two to talk about how much better it is than with a man.
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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If a long dress is evening wear, what is a suit of armor?

Silverware.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How many referral agents does it take to change a light bulb?

Two: One to screw you out of a fee, and the other to send you to a store where they ran out of bulbs weeks ago.
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What is the difference between a pregnant woman and a light bulb?

You can unscrew a light bulb.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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