Why did the oreo go to the dentist?

To get his filling!
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What do basketball players and babies have in common?

They both dribble.
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Why did the Christmas tree go to the barber?

It needed to be trimmed.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What happens when you play Beethoven backwards?

He decomposes.

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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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