Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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What does a cat call a hummingbird?

Fast food.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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Slept like a log last night........

Woke up in the fireplace.

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I stayed up all night because I wanted to see where the sun went,

and then it dawned on me.
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How do you catch a tame bird?

The tame way, unique up on it!
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