Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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What do you call a belt made out of watches?

A waist of time!
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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What do lawyers wear in court?

Lawsuits.
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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How many Ukrainians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None, because people who glow in the dark don't need light bulbs.

Note: Topical to the Chernobyl Reactor disaster of 1984.
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