Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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If the red house is on the left,the blue house is on the right,where is the White House?

In Washington, D.C.
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And how come her cell phone bill was so high?

She was a Roman (roamin) Catholic
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What kind of flower has lips?

Two-lips!
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My phone will ring at 2 in the morning, and my wife'll look at me and go, "Who's that calling at this time?' "I don't know!

If I knew that we wouldn't need the bloody phone!"

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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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