Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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What's in the middle of nowhere?

The letter H.
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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Why was the sand wet?

Because the sea weed
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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