Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Trump: "It's not a toupee,

I just found the Bush that Jeb lost."
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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