Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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What did Tennessee?

The same thing Arkansas.
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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How do you stop a dog barking in the back seat of a car?

Put him in the front seat.
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What's the difference between a jellyfish and a lawyer?

One's a spineless, poisonous blob. The other is a form of sea life.
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Why did the dinosaur cross the road?

The chicken wasn't around yet.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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