Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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How many accountants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What kind of answer did you have in mind?
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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Who says sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me?

A guy who has never been hit with a dictionary.
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What letter can you drink?

T (tea)
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What do ghosts use to wash their hair?

Shamboo!
Frankenstein: Witch can you make me a lemonade?
Witch: Poof you are a lemonade!
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