Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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What do you call a dinosaur at the rodeo?

A Broncosaurus or a Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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What does GOP stand for?

Grabs Our Pussy.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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