Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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Why did the basketball player bring his suitcase to his game?

Because he traveled a lot.
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Who did Frankenstein take to the dance?

His "ghoul" friend!
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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