Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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Why do seagulls fly over the sea?

Because if they flew over the bay, they'd be baygulls!
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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Why does Donald Trump prefer E.T. to illegal immigrants?

Because E.T. eventually went home!
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