Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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What does Donald Trump say when he can't find his Viagra?

"The erection is rigged!"
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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A priest, a rabbi and a vicar walk into a bar.

The barman says, "Is this some kind of joke?"
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What's the difference between a tuba and a vacumn cleaner?

You have to turn one of them on before it sucks.

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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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