Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He was a baaaaaaaaad driver.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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Why do pandas like old movies?

Because they are black and white.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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What breakfast cereal does Frosty the Snowman eat?

Snowflakes.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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