Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.

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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g

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Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

Na
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What is the easiest way to count a herd of cattle?

With a cowculator.

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How many Iraqis does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter, they don't have any electricity any more.

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I would avoid the sushi if I was you.

It’s a little fishy.
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