Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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How many Roman Catholics does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to do the screwing, and one to hear the confession.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.
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Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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