Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Where does a ten ton elephant sit?

Anywhere it wants to
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What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketi
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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