Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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What do you get when you drop a piano on an army base?

A Flat Major

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What kind of fish is made out of 2 sodium atoms?

2 Na
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Why did the dog cross the road twice?

He was trying to fetch a boomerang
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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Where do all the letters sleep?

In the alphabed.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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