Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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How do you handle dangerous cheese?

Caerphilly.
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