Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.

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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh

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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.

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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos

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How many Bratzlaver Chassidim does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They will never find one that burned as brightly as the first one.

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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.

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What is the definition of a shame (as in "that's a shame")?

When a busload of lawyers goes off a cliff.

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