Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a leech?

After you die, a leech stops sucking your blood.
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What did rural America tell Donald Trump?

You're Hired.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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If H20 is water, what is H204?

Drinking, bathing, washing, swimming, etc.
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Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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Why did they kick cinderella off the baseball team?

She kept running away from the ball.
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