Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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Which runs faster, hot or cold water?

Hot, because you can catch cold.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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What is the difference between a fly and superman?

Superman can fly, but a fly cannot superman!
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There are 10 kinds of people in the world.

Those who read binary and those who don't.
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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What do you get if you enroll in a liberal arts program and the only subject you do well in is music?

A natural major.
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