Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.

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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.

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What do you call a rabbit with beetles all over it?

Bugs Bunny.

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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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Why did the drum take a nap?

It was beat.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.

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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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How do you keep a skunk from smelling?

Plug its nose.

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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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