Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.

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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.

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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!

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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None. It turned itself in.

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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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