Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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Which reindeer likes to clean?

Comet
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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What did the one penny say to the other penny?

We make perfect cents.
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