Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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How many Real Men does it take to change a light bulb?

None. Real Men aren't afraid of the dark.
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