Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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What do you call a dinosaur that smashes everything in its path?

Tyrannosaurus wrecks.
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What fish only swims at night?

A starfish.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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How many Director's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Just one more, guys, I promise.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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Whenever I get to Edinburgh, I'm reminded of the definition of a gentleman.

It's someone who knows how to play the bagpipes, but doesn't.
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