Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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How many guitar players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five. One to change the bulb and eleven to say they could do it faster.

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How do you make a million dollars singing jazz?

Start with two million.

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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What's the slipperiest country?

Greece!
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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What do lawyers and sperm have in common?

One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
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