Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What happened when 500 hares got loose on Main Street?

The police had to comb the area.
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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How many charismatics does it take to change a light bulb?

Three - one to cast the bulb into the outer darkness, and two to catch it when it falls.
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What did the carrot say to the rabbit?

Do you want to grab a bite?
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