Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.

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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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How many Union Lighting Technicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

It's not a bulb, it's a globe.

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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Because 7 ate 9.
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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Old chemists never die,

they just stop reacting.
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Where do mice park their boats?

At the hickory dickory dock.

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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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