Why did the poultry farmer become a school teacher?

So he could grade his eggs.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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How many [ethnics] does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Ten. One to hold the bulb and nine to rotate the ladder.
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What do you call a pig that's been arrested for dangerous driving?

A road hog.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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What do you call a dog that likes bubble baths?

A shampoodle
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