Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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Why did the chicken cross the clothing store?

To get to the other size!
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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And the mermaid, that was weird. What was she wearing in math class?

An Algae-bra
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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Why did the elephant leave the circus?

He was tired of working for peanuts.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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