Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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What did one magnet say to the other?

I find you very attractive.
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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What's brown and looks really good on a lawyer?

A Doberman.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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