Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What do chemists call a benzene ring with iron atoms replacing the carbon atoms?

A ferrous wheel.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What do you call a fat pumpkin?

A plumpkin.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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