Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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Kleptomaniacs just don't get puns

they always take things literally.
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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There were 10 cats in a boat and one jumped out. How many were left?

None, because they were copycats
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What concert costs 45 cents?

50 cent featuring Nickelback

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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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