Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.
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What do you give a pig with a rash?

Oinkment.
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What do vampires take when they are sick?

Coffin drops!
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What goes around a haunted house and never stops?

A fence.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.
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