Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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What do whales eat?

Fish and ships.
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How many (Generals/Politicians) does it take to change a light bulb?

1,000,001: One to change the bulb and 1,000,000 to rebuild civilization to the point where they need light bulbs again.
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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