Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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How does a penguin build it's house?

Igloos it together.
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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What did polly the parrot want for the 4th of July?

A fire cracker
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What has four legs and goes "Oom, Oom"?

A cow walking backwards
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Why does hamburger yield lower energy than steak?

Because it's in the ground state.
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How many lawyers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Three, One to climb the ladder. One to shake it. And one to sue the ladder company.
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What is a horse's favorite sport?

Stable tennis
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