Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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Kim Kardashian is saddled with a huge arse.

but enough about Kanye West.
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Why does a dog wag its tail?

Because there's no one else to wag it for him.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady?

Because she would have to move into a smaller house.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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What do you call a pig that does karate?

A pork chop.
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