Why did the rooster cross the road?

To prove he wasn't a chicken!
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What does Melania see in Donald Trump?

"Ten billion dollars and high cholesterol!"
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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Why did the cucumber call 911?

It was in a pickle!
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What do you call 25 attorneys buried up to their chins in cement?

Not enough cement.
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