Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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What do Russians use for napkins?

Soviets
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Where do you put barking dogs?

In a barking lot.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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