Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What is always hot in the refrigerator?

Chili
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How many U.S. Marines does it take to change a light bulb?

Fifty — one to screw in the bulb and 49 to guard him/her.
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What do you get when you cross a Christmas tree with an apple?

A pineapple!
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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Do you know what the Queen's father was called?

King.
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Why did the TV cross the road?

Because it wanted to be a flat screen.
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A man goes to a zoo and discovers there is only one animal and it's a dog.

It was a Shih Tzu
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