Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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A duck, a skunk and a deer went out for dinner at a restaurant one night.

When it came time to pay, the skunk didn't have a scent, the deer didn't have a buck so they put the meal on the duck's bill.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.

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How many professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but they get three tech. reports out of it.

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There was a rooster sitting on a top of a barn. If it laid an egg, which way would it roll?

Roosters don't lay eggs!

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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".

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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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Can you use pink,yellow and green in a sentence?

. The phone went green green, and I pinked it up and said yellow.
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