Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.

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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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What's gray, eats fish, and lives in Washington, D.C.?

The Presidential Seal.

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What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a red car?
A red carnation.
What do you call a country where everyone has to drive a pink car?
A pink car-nation.
What would the country be called if everyone in it lived in their cars?

An in-car-nation.

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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them

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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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