Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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Want to hear a joke about construction?

I'm still working on it.
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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