Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What would you call a humorous knee?

Fun-ny!
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Why do fish live in salt water?

Because pepper makes them sneeze
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Why are kindergarten teachers so good?

They can make little things count.
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What kind of shoes do bannanas make?

Slippers!
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How many alto sax players does it take to change a light bulb?

Five: one to handle the bulb and four to contemplate how David Sanborn would've done it.
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How many times does Bill Clinton change a light bulb?

No one knows. Republicans automatically disbelieve him, and no one can ever trust a stinking liberal anyway.
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