Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What do you get when you cross the Godfather with a lawyer?

An offer you can't understand
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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How many football players does it take to change a light bulb?

The entire team! And they all get a semester's credit for it!
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