Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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Why did the belt go to jail?

It held up a pair of pants.
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?

A ferrous wheel.
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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How many Jewish renewal rabbis does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends. One, if it's an eco-kosher bulb that isn't going to be lit by electricity generated from nuclear power. Two, as long as a man and a woman rabbi have equal turns putting in the bulb. Three, one to change it, one to do a Buddhist mindfulness practice during the change, and one to document the paradigm shift in a best-selling book called The Jew in the Lightbulb. Four, same as above plus an additional rabbi to study the psycho-halachic implications of such a change and then lead a retreat weekend on the experience.
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