Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Why should we call the President, Donald "Duck" Trump?

Because you better duck when he's pissed.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.
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How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?

Cut the rope.
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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