Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!

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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What has four wheels and flies?

A garbage truck.

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I'm sorry we can't let the elephants back into the public pool.

They keep dropping their trunks.
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Why did the football coach go to the bank?

To get his quarterback.
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What's a puppy's favorite kind of pizza?

Pupperoni.

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Trump: "Foreign Policy?,

if you mess with the United States, there will be hell toupee."

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I backed a horse last week at ten to one.

It came in at quarter past four.

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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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