Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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Why didn't the skeleton cross the road?

He didn't have any guts!
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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Why are there fences around a graveyard?

Because people are dying to get in!
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What do you get when you cross a witch with sand?

A sandwich!
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.
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Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed!
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