Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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What happens when you play "the blues" backwards?

Your wife comes back to you, your dog returns to life and you get out of prison.

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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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Where does an elephant pack his luggage?

In his trunk
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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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El Chapo has offered $100 million dollars for Trumps body, dead or alive.

I guess that finally answers the question about how much Donald Trump is actually worth.
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What kind of jam can you not eat?

A traffic jam.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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I wouldn't buy anything with velcro.

It's a total rip-off.
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How do you make a musician's car more aerodynamic?

Take the pizza delivery sign off the roof

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