Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!

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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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What is a tree's favorite drink?

Root beer.

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If H2O is the formula for water, what is the formula for ice?

H2O cubed.
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How many musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and 17 to be on the guest list.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a herd of buffalo?

The lawyer charges more.
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What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cement mixer?

A brick layer!

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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g

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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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