Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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Customer: "Do you have alligator shoes?"

Clerk: "Yes, sir. What size does your alligator wear?"
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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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What do you get when you cross a roll of wool and a kangaroo?

A woolen jumper
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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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Why do you bring fish to a party?

Because it goes good with chips.
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