Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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Why don't aliens eat clowns?

Because they taste funny!
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Did you know that oxygen went for a second date with potassium?
How did it go?

It went OK2!
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How many tenors does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change the bulb and three to whine "It's too high"
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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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What do you call a cat sitting on the beach on Christmas Eve?

Sandy Claws.
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