Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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What happens when spectroscopists are idle?

They turn from notating nuclear spins to notating unclear puns.
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What do you call a bruise on a T-Rex?

A dino-sore
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?

To the mooooooovies.
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What kind of dogs do chemists have?

Laboratory Retrievers
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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How do you make Halloween great again?

By carving a Trumpkin.
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What 7 letters did Lizzy say when she opened the refrigerator and found it empty?

O I C U R M T
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Where was the Declaration of Independence signed?

On the bottom.
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Where would an astronaut park his space ship?

A parking meteor!
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