Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.
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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.
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How many light bulbs does it take to change a light bulb?

One, if it knows its own Goedel number.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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