Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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Why does Snoop Dogg carry an umbrella?

Fo Drizzle!

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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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Went to the corner shop -

bought 4 corners.

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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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If the Silver Surfer and Iron Man team up, they'd be alloys.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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Why do hummingbirds hum?

Because they don't know the words.
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