Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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What would happen if pigs could fly?

The price of bacon would go up.
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What can you hold without ever touching it?

A conversation.
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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What did the momma buffalo say to her son before he went to school?

Bison
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What kind of motorcycle does Santa ride?

Holly Davidson.
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What kind of eggs does a wicked chicken lay?

Deviled eggs.
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Why did the carpenter fall asleep on the job?

He was board.
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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