Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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What is the best time to go to the dentist?

Tooth-hurty.
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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The first time I met my wife, I knew she was a keeper.

She was wearing massive gloves.
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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