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Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?
He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?
To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Where do cows go on Saturday night?
To the mooooooovies.
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What do you call a movie about Donald Trump, Bernie Madoff, and Kenneth Lay?
The League of Extraordinary Con Men.
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What did one cow say to the other?
Mooooooove over
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Which day do fish hate?
Fryday
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me
Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What bird can lift the most?
A crane.
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How many radical feminists does it take to change a light bulb?
That isn't funny!
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What do you call a wheel made of iron?
A ferrous wheel.
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