Why did the scientist take out his doorbell?

He wanted to win the no-bell prize!
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What can you hold without using your hands?

Your breath!
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How do you know an elephant has been in your refrigerator?

There are footprints in the butter.
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What do you give a lemon in distress?

Lemonade.
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What did the painter say to the wall?

I got you covered.
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What did the snail say when he got on the turtle's shell?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin'!
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Humpty Trumpty wants a great wall.

Humpty Trumpty wants Mexico to pay for it all.
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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