Why did the sea monster eat five ships that were carrying potatoes?

No one can eat just one potato ship.

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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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What did Donald Trump do before criticizing illegals?

He made sure his pools were clean and his lawns were mowed.
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What is a pirate's favorite's fish?

A swordfish

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Two satellites decided to get married.

The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible!
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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Why was the mole of oxygen molecules excited when he walked out of the singles bar?

He got Avogadro's number!
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