Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium?

HeHe
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What does an octopus wear when it gets cold?

A coat of arms.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What kind of balls do dragons play soccer with?

Fireballs.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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How many actors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

100: One to do it and ninety-nine to say "I could've done that."
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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