Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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What do you call a king who is only 12 inches tall?

A ruler.
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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How do you know Donald Trump is talking to you?

Cause your the only one Hair.
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I just watched a program about beavers.

It was the best dam program I've ever seen.
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When the attendant asked the photon if it had any bags to check

It said Nah, I'm traveling light.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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How do you make a hot dog stand?

Steal its chair.
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