Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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What is the opposite of a restaurant?

A workaraunt.
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What did the picture say to the wall?

I've been framed.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon!
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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Why did the cow cross the road?

To get to the udder side.
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What do you call a fish without an eye?

Fsh
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