Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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How many Stuntmen does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Five. One to screw it in and four to tell him how bitchin' he looked doing it.

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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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Why don't mountains get cold in the winter?

They wear snowcaps.
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What is the most important subject a witch learns in school?

Spelling.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What does cheese like to drink?

Morbier
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.

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