Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We'll see about that."

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What do birds say on Halloween?

Twick o tweet
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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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How many UNIX hacks does it take to change a light bulb?

As many as you want; they're all virtual anyway.
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How many Sound Recordists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

WHAT?
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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