Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What did one volcano say to the other?

I lava you.
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I was having dinner with Garry Kasporov (world chess champion) and there was a check tablecloth.

It took him two hours to pass me the salt.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What does a cat say when somebody steps on
its tail?

Me-ow
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Dorian Gray Jokes,

they never get old!
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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