Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What do you call a cow that twitches?

Beef jerky
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How many Italians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

I dunno exactly, but my brother's girlfriend's father's boss's secretary's sister's next-door neighbors' priest's cousin's union shop steward's uncle's Knights Of Columbus club Sergeant-of-Arms's nephew's best friend did it real cheap for me once.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It’s Hans free.
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What part of a fish weighs the most?

The scales.
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Clowns divorce:

custardy battle.
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How many [ethnic] gods does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two. One to hold the bulb and the other to rotate the planet.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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Why didn't the girl take the bus home?

Because her mom would make her take it back.
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