Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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What happened when the lion ate the comedian?

He felt funny.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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What do you call a deer that costs a dollar?

A buck.
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How do you get a dog to stop digging in the garden?

Take away his shovel
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