Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What does the winner of the race lose?

His breath.
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How did the butcher introduce his wife?

Meet Patty.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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What's the difference between a fish and a piano?

You can't tuna fish.
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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Why don't honest people need beds?

They don't lie.
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