Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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How many Trumpet players does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. But he'll leave a big puddle of spit on the floor underneath him.
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How do they serve smart hamburgers?

On honor rolls.
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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What do you get when you cross a duck with a vampire?

Count Quackula!
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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