Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What does a calf become after it's 1 year old?

2 years old.

Cow: "Mooooove over"
Sheep: "Naaaaaaa."
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What did the little girl say when she had to choose between a tricycle and a candy bar?

"Trike or Treat"?
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.
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How many French Horn players does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, but he/she will spend hours checking for technical problems.
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When one physicist asks another, "What's new?" what's the typical response?

C over lambda.
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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How many TV comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two, one to screw it in, and another to say "Sock it to Me." (Notes: Sock it = Socket. Also, for the infant readers among you, this was a popular catch-phrase from "Laugh In.")
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