Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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This graveyard looks overcrowded.

People must be dying to get in there.
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Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks.

They charged one - and let the other one off.

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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?

White vans.
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What nails do carpenters hate to hit?

Fingernails.
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 100?
Your Honor.
What do you call a lawyer with an IQ of 50

Senator.
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Where does Dorian Gray shop?

Forever 21
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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