Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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How many art directors does it take to screw in a light bulb

Does it have to be a light bulb? I've got this neat candle holder...
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What`s black & white & red all over?

An embarrased mime!
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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Why did the opera singer go sailing?

Because she wanted to hit the high C's.
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Why did the cow go in the spaceship?

It wanted to see the mooooooon!
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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How do crows stick together in a flock?

Velcrow.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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