Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute?

A prostitute will stop screwing you when you're dead.
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What do Santa's elves learn in school?

The Elfabet.
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How many PA' does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What's a light bulb?
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How many TV evangelists does it take to change a light bulb?

One. But for the message of light to continue, send in your donation today.
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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut
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What do you call a pig who knows karate?

Porkchop
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What do an accordion and a lawsuit have in common?

Everyone is relieved when the case is closed.

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