Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What did one hair say to the other?

It takes two to tangle!
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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?

A good start!
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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What's worse than a worm in your apple?

Half a worm.
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Why did Mozart kill his chickens?

Because they always ran around going "Bach! Bach! Bach!"

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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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How many grips does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Two: One to hold it, one to hammer it in.
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What do Donald Trump and a baby have in common?

They both whine alot!
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