Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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Do you know how many musicians it takes to change a light bulb?

No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it.
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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How many Stanford professors does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One to write a paper claiming that light is a pig whitey invention, one to organize a Darkness Studies program, and one hundred to protest the Diablo Canyon Nuclear Generating Station.
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Knock, knock!
Who's there?
Snow.
Snow who?

Snowbody!
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I'm on a whiskey diet.

I've lost three days already.

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I just watched a debate as to which cartoons were better- Disney or Warner Bros.

I have to say it got very animated.
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What kind of potato chips fly?

Plane ones.
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