Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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How can you get four suits for a dollar?


Buy a deck of cards.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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What do you call an elephant in a phone booth?

Stuck
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How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?

None. That's a software problem.
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I cleaned the attic with the wife the other day.

Now I can't get the cobwebs out of her hair.

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