Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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What did the alien say when he was out of room?

I'm all spaced out!
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?

Alley cats.
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What do you get if you cross an insect with the Easter rabbit?

Bugs Bunny.
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Earlier this year I saw The Theory of Everything – loved it.

Should've been called Look Who's Hawking, that's my only criticism.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A newspaper!
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