Why did the skeleton cross the road?

To get to the body shop.
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How are doughnuts and golf alike?

They both have a hole in one!
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What time is it when an elephant sits on your bed?

Time to get a new bed

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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

Because he was caught tweeting on a test.

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What's the definition of a gentleman?

One who knows how to play the saxophone, but doesn't!

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What is the strongest animal?

A snail because it carries it's home.

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What do Santa's elves drive?

Minivans.
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What was the farmer doing on the other side of the road?

He was catching all the chickens!

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