Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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What did one egg say to the other egg?

Let's get crackin!
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How many fatalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What does it matter? we're all gonna die anyway.
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How many running-dog lackeys of the bourgeoisie does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to exploit the proletariat, and one to control the means of production!
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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What do you get when you plant a frog?

A cr-oak tree.
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What kind of dog has a bark but no bite?

A Dogwood
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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