Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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"Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf."

"Please be quiet and comb your face."
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Why did the bird get a ticket?

It broke the law of gravity!
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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

First they have to agree on which is better; the analog bulb or a digital bulb.
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Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. But when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank,

proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.

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Why did the singer climb a ladder?

She wanted to reach the high notes!

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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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Why did the cookie go to the Doctor?

Because he was feeling crumby.
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