Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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The defendant is accused of putting dynamite into a steer.

Abominable! [A Bomb In a Bull]
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Why was the math book sad?

It had too many problems.
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How many New Yorkers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

None 'o yo' fuckin' business!
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What kind of cat should you never play games with?

A cheetah
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Where can you find a good lawyer?

In the cemetery
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What is the chemical formula for "banana"?

BaNa2
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How many supply-siders does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The darkness will cause the bulb to change by itself.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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