Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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Why do you think Civil Disobedience was such a fantastic essay?

Thoreau editing Thorough.
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What do you call a cow that eats your grass?

A lawn moo-er.
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What did the mother broom say to the baby broom?

It's time to go to sweep.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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Did you hear about Michael Jackson's latest record?

"Feel the World."
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What did the Mass Spectrometer say to the Gas Chromatograph?

Breaking up is hard to do.
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I have a friend who is a Limo driver . But he has had no clients for two years.

So he has nothing to chauffeur it !
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How many teamsters does it take to change a light bulb?

``Twelve. Ya got a problem with that?''
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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