Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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There's a fine line between a numerator and denominator.

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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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What did the ceiling say to the chandelier?

You're the only bright spot in my life.
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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What do you do when your chair breaks?

Call a chairman.
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Why didn't the skeleton want to go to school?

His heart wasn't in it.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What day of the week tastes the best?

Sunday!
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