Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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How many ``pro-lifers'' does it take to change a light bulb?

6: 2 to screw in the bulb and 4 to testify that it was lit from the moment they began screwing.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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The stormtrooper was enjoying the Wookie steak,

but it was a little Chewie.
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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I used to work in a shoe recycling shop.

It was sole destroying.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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How many sheep do you need to make a sweater?

I don't know. I didn't think sheep could knit
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Why can't hippos ride bicycles?

Bike helmets don't fit hippos
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