Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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What is a parents favorite Christmas carol?

Silent night!
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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How many Agents does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Actually, agents will screw in just about anything.
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What did one owl say to the other owl?

Happy Owl-ween!
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What kind of music do planets sing?

Neptunes!
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A man walks into a bar with a roll of tarmac under his arm and says:

"Pint please, and one for the road."

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That girl said she knew me from the vegitarian club,

but I'd never seen herbivore [her before]
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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