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Why did the spy stay in bed?
Because he was under cover.
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I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite
......... one jar.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me
Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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How do you wake up Lady Gaga?
You Poke her face.
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I tried nutella on some salmon
got salmonella.
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How do you make a cello sound beautiful?
Sell it and buy a violin
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?
Is that you mommy?
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What's the best parting gift?
A comb.
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What kind of cats like to go bowling?
Alley cats.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand
and says make me one with everything.
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