Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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Jesus fed 5000 people with two fishes and a loaf of bread.

That's not a miracle. That's tapas.
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What do you call a messy hippo?

A hippopota-mess
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What do you call a dinosaur that never gives up?

A try and try and try-ceratops
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Why did the Blonde stare at the Orange Juice carton?

Because it said CONCENTRATE.
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Why don't they know where Mozart is buried?

Because he's Haydn.

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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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There's two fish in a tank, and one says "How do you drive this thing?"
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What do envelopes say when you lick them?

Nothing, it shuts them up!
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