Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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What's the definition of a minor second?

Two flutes playing in unison.

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What do Santa's elves drink?

Minnesoda.
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What do you get when you drop a piano into a mine shaft?

A Flat Miner

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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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What's the difference between an accountant and a lawyer?

Accountants know they're boring.
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?

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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon?

Great food, no atmosphere.
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