Why did the spy stay in bed?

Because he was under cover.
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What do you do if your cat swallows your pencil?

Use a pen.
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How do you fix a broken Tuba.

With a tuba glue.
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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What did the policeman say when his tummy was rumbling?

Stop! You're under a vest.
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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How many Zen masters does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A tree in a golden forest.
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How did the chemist survive the famine?

By subsisting on titrations.
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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What do you call a cow in a tornado?

A milkshake
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