Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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Why does Trump love the poorly educated?

Because they only know their ABCs "Anybody But Clinton".
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I tried water polo but my horse drowned.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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Why are pirates great singers?

They can hit the high C's!

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Why is Superman's costume so tight?

Because he wears a size "S".
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How do you fix a broken vegetable?

With tomato paste.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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