Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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How do you tell you're kissing a french horn player?

He/She keeps trying to stick their fist up your butt.

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What's worse than a centipede with athlete's foot?

A porcupine with split ends
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What's the tallest building in the world?

The library, because it has the most stories.
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Why did the cow go to outer space?

To visit the milky way.
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Knock, knock
Who's there?
Merry.
Merry who?

Merry Christmas!
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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What did the candle say to the other candle?

I'm going out tonight!
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What is a cat's favorite breakfast?

Mice krispies
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