Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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Why does cheese look sane?

Because everything else on the plate is crackers.
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What's a dog's favorite food for breakfast?

Pooched eggs.
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Doc, I can't stop singing the 'Green Green Grass of Home'. He said: 'That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome'. 'Is it common?'I asked.

'It's not unusual' he replied.

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What did the grape say when the elephant stepped on it?

It gave a little wine
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Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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When are kids most likely to go to school?

When the door is open.
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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Why was the ant so confused?

Because all his uncles were "ants"!
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