Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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What do fish take to stay healthy?

Vitamin sea.
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What did the necktie say to the hat?

You go on ahead. I'll hang around for a while.
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H2O is water and H2O2 is hydrogen peroxide. What is H2O4?

Drinking.
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How many BMI employees does it take to screw in a light bulb?

They screw millions of bulbs every day, but when it comes to your bulbs, there's no record.
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What do you call a Mexican who has lost his car?

Carlos.
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What did one cow say to the other?

Mooooooove over
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Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?

He was playing by ear

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