Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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How many technical writers does it take to change a light bulb?

Just one, provided there is a programmer around to explain how to do it.
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How are elephants and trees alike?

They both have trunks
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Why did the people not like the restaurant on the moon?

Because there was no atmosphere.
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Red sky at night: shepherd’s delight.

Blue sky at night: day.
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How many folk singers does it take to change a light bulb?

Two — one to change the bulb, and one to write a song about how good the old light bulb was.
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Why did the policeman give the sheep a ticket?

He made an illegal ewe turn.
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How many fatalists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

What does it matter? we're all gonna die anyway.
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How do you cut a wave in half?

Use a sea saw.
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What do you get when you cross a blonde and a lawyer?

I don't know. There are some things even a blonde won't do.
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