Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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How do you prevent a Summer cold?

Catch it in the Winter!
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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How many law professors does it take to change a light bulb?

Hell, you need 250 just to lobby for the research grant.
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What cell phones do travelling nuns use?

Virgin mobile.
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How many Marxists does it take to change a light bulb?

None. The light bulb contains the seeds of its own revolution.
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Why did the cow cross the road?

Because the chicken was on vacation.
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What's the name of the archeologist that works at Scotland Yard?

Sherlock Bones.
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What do you get if Bach dies and is reincarnated as twins?

A pair of Re-Bachs.

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