Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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What do you get if you cross a cat with a dark horse?

Kitty Perry

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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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What do you call a public servant who doesn't take crap from Republicans or Democrats?

Donald Trump.
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What did the belly button say just before it left?

I'm outtie here!

Tom: I bet I can make you say purple.
Joe: How?
Tom: What colors are in the American flag?
Joe: Red, white and blue.
Tom: I told you I can make you say red.
Joe: You said purple!
Tom: I told you I could make you say purple!
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How many magicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Depends on what you want to change it into.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What kind of cars do cats drive?

Catillacs
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