Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a liar?

The pronunciation.
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What do you call a cow with no legs?

Ground beef.
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How many Klingons does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two. One to screw it in, and one to stab the other in the back and take all the credit.
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What do planets like to read?

Comet books!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of manure?

The bucket.
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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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What has four legs, a trunk, and sunglasses?

A mouse on vacation.
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What did Donald Trump say to the birthday boy?

"Let me see your birth certificate".
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What do you call a tooth in a glass of water?

One molar solution.
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