Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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What has 4 wheels, gives milk, and eats grass.

A cow on a skateboard.
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How many Macintosh users does it take to change a light bulb?

None. You have to replace the whole motherboard.
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What's black and white and red all over?

A blushing zebra.
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How Many lead guitarist does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They just steal somebody else's light.
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Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field.
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Where do sheep get their hair cut?

At the baa-baa shop.
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What clothes does a house wear?

Address.
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How many Mensans does it take to tell Mensa light bulb jokes?

Five. One to tell the joke and one to get it.
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What did the dog say to the flea?

Stop bugging me!
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