Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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I met a Dutch girl with inflatable shoes last week, phoned her up to arrange a date

but unfortunately she'd popped her clogs.

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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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I thought about going on an all-almond diet.

But that's just nuts
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What has holes all over and holds water?

A sponge!
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What is a cow's favorite place?

The mooseum.
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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What do you call a song sung in an automobile?

A cartoon.
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What do you call a man with a rubber toe?

Roberto.
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What does the toast wear to bed?

Jammies!
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