Why did the strawberry call 911?

It was in a jam!
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Why did Bach have so many children?

He did not have a stop on his organ.

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How many cats does it takes to screw in a light bulb?

You can throw away your light bulbs. Just douse the cat with gasoline, light it up with a match, and you'll have all the light you need. (Comment: BLEAH!)
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Why did the turtle cross the road?

To get to the shell station.
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How many lawyer jokes are there?

Only three. The rest are true stories.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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How many music teachers does it take to screw in a light bulb??

None. music teachers can't afford lightbulbs.
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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How many 2nd AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Uh...standby, I'll check on that.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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