Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What did one eye say to the other?

Between you and me, something smells.
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What is black ,white and red all over?

A sunburnt penguin
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What do you call a bankrupt Santa?

Saint Nickel-less.
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What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together?

CSI
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Which day do fish hate?

Fryday
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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How is Donald Trump going to shut down the Department of Education?

By renaming it Trump University.
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.
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