Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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How can a pregnant woman tell that she's carrying a future lawyer?

She has an uncontrollable craving for bologna.
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Why does everybody like Frosty the Snowman?

Because he is so cool!
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How many sopranos does it take to change a light bulb?

Three. One to climb the ladder while the second kicks the ladder out from under her. And the third to say, "I knew that was too high for you dear."
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What do you call a loony spaceman?

An astronut.
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What do you get if Bach falls off a horse but has the courage to get on again and continue riding?

Bach in the saddle again.

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What is a lion's favorite state?

Maine
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What is as big as an elephant but weighs nothing?

Its shadow
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Have you heard the joke about the butter?

I better not tell you, it might spread.
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Where are cars most likely to get flat tires?

At forks in the road.
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