Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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What do you give a sick bird?

Tweetment.
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Whats the difference between a cat and a compound sentence?

One has claws at the end of its paws and one has a pause at the end of its clause
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What did the frog say when he heard "time flies when you are having fun?"

Time is fun when you're having flies
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What do you call a gorilla wearing earmuffs?

Anything you like, he can't hear you.
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What do you use to tie saplings to a piano so the saplings won't blow away?

Root position cords.

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What is a cat's favorite movie?

The sound of Mew-sic
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Why does a giraffe have such a long neck?

Because his feet stink
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