Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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Once there was a family called the Biggers. There was Mr. Bigger, Mrs. Bigger, and their son. Who was bigger, Mr. Bigger or his son?

His son, because he's a little Bigger!
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What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta
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Why do ghosts make good cheerleaders?

Because they have a lot of spirit.
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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What kind of dessert does a ghost like?

I scream!
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What do you call a mommy cow that just had a calf?

Decalfinated
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What did the farmer call the cow that would not give him any milk?

An udder failure.
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What is a shark's favorite sandwich?

Peanut butter and jellyfish.
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Why do they bury lawyers under 20 feet of dirt?

Because deep down, they're really good people.
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