Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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Silver walks up to Gold in a bar and says, "AU, get outta here!"
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What has one horn and gives milk?

A milk truck.
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Why did the calendar write its will?

Its days were numbered.
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What do you call a scared train?

A fright train!
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Two chemists go into a restaurant.
The first one says "I think I'll have an H2O."

The second one says "I think I'll have an H2O too" -- and he died.
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Why did the chemist sole and heel his shoes with silicone rubber?

To reduce his carbon footprint.
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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What has four legs but never stands?

A Chair!
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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.
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