Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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What is very funny and makes dogs itch?

The Flea Stooges!
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What did the banana do when the monkey chased it?

The banana split
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I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport.

I’m just doing it for kicks.
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What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?

A drummer

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What pine has the longest needles?

A porcupine.
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Know how copper wire was invented?

Two lawyers were fighting over a penny.
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How do you stop an elephant from charging?

Take away his credit card
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.
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