Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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My mother-in-law fell down a wishing well,

I was amazed, I never knew they worked.

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What's a light-year?

The same as a regular year, but with less calories.
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What's a royal pardon?

It's what the queen says after she burps.
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Why are babies good at soccer?

Because they dribble!
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What is a ghost's favorite fruit?

Booberries!
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What do you do with a dead chemist?

Barium
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How many Psychiatrists does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but the bulb has got to really WANT to change.
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What was the first animal in space?

The cow that jumped over the moon
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Which 2 food groups make up Donald Trumps diet?

Meat and Democrats!
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