Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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Why does the Donald sleep with a potato in his briefs?

Because he want to wake up some day as America's First Dictator.
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What is the chemical formula for "coffee"?

CoFe2
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What did Tennessee?
The same thing Arkansas.
What did Delaware?

Her New Jersey.
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What's the definition of perfect pitch?

When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

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What did the man on the beach say to Michael Jackson?

Get out of my sun!
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What did the porcupine say to the cactus?

Is that you mommy?
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How many U.S marines does it take to screw in a light bulb?

50. One to screw in the light bulb and the remaining 49 to guard him .
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What did the octopus say to his girlfriend when he proposed?

Can I have your hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand, hand in marriage?
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How many bass clarinetists does it take to change a light bulb?

All of them
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