Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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How many Anglicans does it take to change a lightbulb?

A whole synod. One to move that the bulb be changed while the others debate until the room spins.
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A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair, so she goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps out of bed, begging and pleading with her not to shoot herself.

The blonde responds to the husband, "Shut up...you're next!"
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Where do horses live?

In the neigh-borhood.
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What do bees do with their honey?

They cell it.
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What is on the ground and also a hundred feet in the air?

A centipede on its back!
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What do you call a deer with no eyes?

No I deer
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I've got a friend who's fallen in love with two school bags,

he's bisatchel.

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots?

Tyrannosaurus Tex.
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I’ve never gone to a gun range before.

I decided to give it a shot!
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