Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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Why did the doughnut shop close?

The owner got tired of the (w)hole business!
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What is black when clean, and white when dirty?

A blackboard.
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I just deleted all the German names off my phone.

It's Hans free.
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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What do you call a thieving alligator?

A crookodile
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What did the Donald tell an illegal immigrant who was trying to put out a fire at Trump Tower?

No way Hose A.
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How many punk rockers does it take to change a light bulb?

Twenty. One to hold the bulb, two to turn the ladder, and seventeen on the guest list.
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How does an Eskimo stick his house together?

With igloo!
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How many mathematicians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

One. He gives it to six Californians, thereby reducing the problem to an earlier joke...

In earlier work, Wiener [1] has shown that one mathematician can change a light bulb.

If k mathematicians can change a light bulb, and if one more simply watches them do it, then k+1 mathematicians will have changed the light bulb.

Therefore, by induction, for all n in the positive integers, n mathematicians can change a light bulb.

Bibliography:

[1] Wiener, Matthew P., <11485@ucbvax>, Re: YALBJ, 1986
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