Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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How many IBM PC owners does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one, but she/he'll have to go out and buy the light bulb adaptor card first, which is extra.
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What do you call snake with no clothes on?

Snaked.
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I bought some shoes off of a drug dealer. I don't know what he laced them with

but I've been trippin' all day.
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What's the best parting gift?

A comb.
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Why do cows go to New York?

To see the moosicals
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What is the difference between a locomotive engineer and a teacher?

One minds the train, one trains the mind.
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How does Donald Trump intend to spice up the Republican Convention?

By relocating it to a casino!
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What do moms dress up as on Halloween?

Mummies!
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