Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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What do you call a mad elephant?

An earthquake.
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How do you know the economy is only getting worse?

On the latest episode of "Celebrity Apprentice", Donald Trump fired himself!
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How does Donald Trump plan on deporting 12 million illegal immigrants?

Juan by Juan.
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Why did a boy thow a clock out the window?

To see time fly.
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How are an apple and a lawyer alike?

They both look good hanging from a tree.
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How many members of the United Church of Canada does it take to change a light bulb?

How dare you be so intolerant! So what if the light bulb has chosen an alternative light-style?
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How is a dog like a telephone?

It has a collar I.D.
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What do you call a dinosaur in a car accident?

A tyrannosauraus wreck
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