Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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Why did the lamb cross the road?

To get to the baaaaarber shop
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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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What did one elevator say to the other?

I think I'm coming down with something!
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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What's the difference between a lawyer and a vulture?

The lawyer gets frequent flyer miles.
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Where do ghosts buy their food?

At the ghost-ery store!
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How many singers from Nashville does it take to change a light bulb?

Four. One to change it, one to sing about how heartbroken he is at the loss of the old one, one to sing about how madly in love he is with the new one, and one to go "Yee-Hah!" and throw his cowboy hat in the air.
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What did Michael Jackson tell the little boy?

"The way you make me feel, it really turns me on!"
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