Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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How did Noah see the animals in the Ark at night?

With flood lighting.
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A mexican magician tells the audience he will disappear on the count of 3. He says, "Uno, dos..." and then

*poof* … he disappeared without a tres!
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Who earns a living by driving his customers away?

A taxi driver.
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How many alumnae of (sorority name) does it take to change a light bulb?

Two. One to change it and one to act as chaperone.
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Don't trust atoms,

they make up everything.
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Why did the little bird get in trouble at school?

He got caught peeping on a test.
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What do you call a dog with a Rolex?

A watch dog.
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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb?

Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say "I don't know, what do you think?"

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