Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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What is a tornado's favorite game?

Twister!
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So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds".

I said, "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".
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What do you do if your dog chews a dictionary?

Take the words out of his mouth
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What kind of dog always runs a fever?

A hot dog
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How many actors does it take to change a light bulb?

Only one. They don't like to share the spotlight.
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Why did the girl throw the butter out the window?

She wanted to see a butterfly.
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What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

Nacho cheese.
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What do you call a crate of ducks?

A box of quackers.
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