Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!

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How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb up a tree and act like a nut

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What is Claustrophobia?

The fear of Santa Claus.
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What has legs but doesn't walk?

A bed.

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What is a snowman's favorite breakfast?

Frosted Flakes!
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What is the difference between a car and a bull?

A car only has one horn.

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How do you make Holy water?

Take regular water and just boil the hell out of it.
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A proton and a neutron are walking down the street.
The proton says, "Wait, I dropped an electron help me look for it."

The neutron says "Are you sure?" The proton replies "I'm positive."
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Why can't a bicycle stand up?

Because it's two tired!
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