Why did the sun go to school?

To get brighter!
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Why can't lawyers do NMR?

Bar magnets have poor homogeneity.
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Why shouldn't Donald Trump rag on illegal immigrants?

Because an undocumented worker has been living on his head for the past 2 decades!
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Who makes dinosaur clothes?

A dino-sewer.
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What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into his bar?

OH SNaP!
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What do you see when you look into Trump's eyes?

Answer: The back of his head.
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What is the snake's favorite subject?

Hiss-story
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Why would an elephant paint its toenails different colors?

To hide in a bag of M&M's.
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What bird can lift the most?

A crane.
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