Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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What do you call a snowman in the desert?

A puddle!
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Why would Snow White make a great judge?

She was the fairest in the land.
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How do you make a goldfish old?

Take away the g
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What did the flag say to the pole?

Nothing, it just waved.
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What did one ion say to the other?

I've got my ion you.
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I know loads of jokes about cash machines,

I just can't think of one atm.
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Two aerials meet on a roof - fall in love - get married.

The ceremony was rubbish - but the reception was brilliant.

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Why is Donald Trump always seen with Melania?

Because all his other wives support Hillary.
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What element is derived from a Norse god?

Thorium.
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