Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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How many bikers does it take to change a light bulb?

It takes two. One to change the bulb, and the other to kick the switch.
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What do you call a parrot that flew away?

A polygon
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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.
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Did you know that you can cool yourself to -273.15 Degrees C

and still be 0k?
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What type of cars do elves drive?

Toy-otas.
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What message did Bach have on his answering machine?

"This phone is baroque, please call Bach later."

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Interesting story, the guy who helped me learn algebra never farted around anyone.

I mean he did say he was a private tutor.
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Where do cars go for a swim?

At the carpool!
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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