Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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Why did the surfer think the sea was his friend?

Because it gave him a big wave!
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How many board meetings does it take to get a light bulb changed?

This topic was resumed from last week's discussion, but is incomplete pending resolution of some action items. It will be continued next week. Meanwhile . . .
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I tried nutella on some salmon

got salmonella.
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What is a cheetahs favorite food?

Fast food

A team of little animals and a team of big animals decided to play football. During the first half of the game, the big animals were winning. But during the second half,a centipede scored so many touchdowns that the little animals won the game. When the game was over, the chipmunk asked the centipede, "Where were you during the first half?" He replied "Putting on my shoes".
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Where do orcas hear music?

Orca-stras
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Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself?

It was two tired.
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What element is a girl's future best friend?

Carbon.
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Why don't bears wear shoes?

What's the use, they'd still have bear feet
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If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him?

It might be your bicycle.
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