Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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Why couldn't the pirates play cards?

They were sitting on the deck!
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What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?

When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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Why is a skeleton so mean?

He doesn't have a heart.
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I asked the guy sitting next to me if he had any Sodium Hypobromite

He said NaBrO
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What did the little boy's mom say when he asked her to buy him shoes for gym?

"Tell Jim to buy his own shoes".
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What is Donald Trump telling all his supporters?


Orange Is The New Black.
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If minorities have the race card and women have the gender card, what do rednecks have?

The Trump Card
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A Freudian slip is when you mean to say one thing

but you accidentally say Mother.
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What do you call a sleeping bull?

A bulldozer
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