Why did the thief take a shower?

He wanted to make a clean getaway!
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What is King Arthur's favorite fish?

A swordfish
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They're always telling me to live my dreams.

But I don't want to be naked in an exam I haven't revised for.
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What room can you not go into?

A mushroom!
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I said to this train driver "I want to go to Paris". He said "Eurostar?"

I said, "I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin".
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Why didn't the skeleton go to the ball?

Because he had no BODY to go with.
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How does the ocean say hello?

It waves.
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What did the class clown take a computer to school?

Her mom told her to bring in an apple for the teacher.
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A Bhuddist monk goes to a hotdog stand

and says make me one with everything.
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Why did the news reporter go to the ice cream parlor?

Because she wanted to get a good scoop.
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