Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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What is "HIJKLMNO"?

H2O.
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What do cats and dogs call Santa Clause?

Santa paws!!!
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Why did God make snakes just before lawyers?

To practice.
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What do you get from a cow at the North Pole?

Ice cream.
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What's an alligator's favorite drink?

Gator-Ade.
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Someone threw a bottle of omega 3 pills at me

Luckily my injuries were only super fish oil
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What do you call a cold dog sitting on a bunny?

A chili dog on a bun.
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What did Delaware?

A New Jersey.
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Who can hold up a bus with one hand?

A crossing guard.
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