Why did the tomato blush?

Because he saw the salad dressing!
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.

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How many Executive Producers does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Executive Producers don't screw in a light bulb, they screw in a hot tub.

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What robs you while you're in the bathtub?

A robber ducky.

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Why did Mickey Mouse get whacked in the head?

coz Donald ducked
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What do you get when you cross a snowman with a vampire?

Frostbite.
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Why is it that many lawyers have broken noses?

From chasing parked ambulances.
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What do you call a story about a broken pencil?

Pointless
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What did the peanut say to the elephant?

Nothing, peanuts don't talk.

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What goes 99 thump,99 thump,99 thump?

A centipede with a wooden leg.

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