Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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Why don't aliens celebrate Chistmas?

Because they don't want to give away their presence.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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What do you call a clown who's in jail?

A silicon.
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What happened to the man who was stopped for having sodium chloride and a nine-volt in his car?

He was booked for a salt and battery.
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Why can't you compare Donald Trump to cancer?

Because sometimes you can get rid of cancer.
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Why did the student eat her homework?

Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
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What is black and white and red all over?

A skunk with a rash.
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Why was the boy sitting on his watch?

Because he wanted to be on time.
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How do dinosaurs pay their bills?

With Tyrannosaurus checks.
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