Why did the tree get a computer?

To log on.
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How does a train sneeze?

Ah-choo-choo!
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How many folk musicians does it take to change a light bulb?

Seven. One to change it and the other six to sing about how good the old one was.
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How does a bird with a broken wing manage to land safely?

With its sparrowchute.
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Why are Muslims worried about Trumps immigration plans?

Once you deport Juan you deport Jamal.
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What kind of ties can't you wear?

Railroad ties.
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How did the egg cross the road?

It scrambled across!
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How many drummers does it take to change a light bulb?

None. They have machines to do that now.
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What is Donald Trumps campaign slogan?

"A complex world demands complex hair."
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What does new age music sound like played backwards?

New age music.

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